Both Whitesnake and I have favorite places to get trashed but for very different reasons.  Since we’re collaborating on this endeavor, we needed to hammer out a means to objectively rate what the dude from the Willy B (Whitesnake) and the jock from Sunset Park (me. Judas) had to say.  This is what we came up with:

Happy Hour:  How cheap is their happy hour, how long does it last, and what is the selection like?

Who would like it:  Who frequents this bar? 

Prices:  If you just paid rent, would you be able to drink here?

Huckle Rating:  This rating conveys a sense of how likely you are to meet someone of the opposite sex at this place on a given night. 

Split Lip Factor:  What are the odds that you’re going to get cracked for popping off or just being there?

If this bar was a celebrity:  What person in the public eye does this bar most exemplify?  Whose personality most closely matches the look and feel of this place?